10 Simple Actions to Improve your Marriage

9) I compare you, my love,
to a mare among Pharaoh’s chariots.

10) Your cheeks are lovely with ornaments,
your neck with strings of jewels.

15) Behold, you are beautiful, my love;
behold, you are beautiful;
your eyes are doves.

Verses from Chapter 1 in the Song of Solomon. Read the entire Book if you really want to spice up your love life…

Did it ever occur to you that the reason your wife doesn’t feel beautiful, hot or special is because of some very specific things you are doing wrong? Who you? Yes you!

As men, it is part of our responsibility to make sure the woman you love feels special and wanted. As a challenge, kick-start your romance by reading the Song of Solomon together. Each person can read their parts and let the night take you from there. You’ll wonder how this information ever made it into the Bible.  Here are 10 more ways to make your wife feel special!


Here are 10 simple actions to improve your marriage today!

1) Greet Her First Once I get home, I make it a goal to kiss her first (and smile). My phone gets put away, the current state of the house isn’t taken into account and my boy can have my attention in a minute. She gets my first fruits.

2) Listen to Her I get it, you had a hard and long day. But there’s a good chance she did too. Ask her how her day was and if anything of note happened. If she’s working on a project or hasn’t been feeling good, make following up on those items a priority.

3) Pray for Her I admit that I sometimes have a hard time praying with my wife, but I find myself praying for her (and my son) very often. Pray for her when you leave for work in the morning. Pray for her work, her projects or her spirit. She may not see it, but she’ll feel it.

4) Touch Her Look, I didn’t write the Song of Solomon, but there was some serious loving going on there. Make her feel special by giving her a random shoulder rub, foot massage or just a long hug. Be intentional, but don’t over do it gents.

5) Write Little Notes Quick tip: Get to a little book or paper store and buy some post it notes you can use for little love notes. Leave one of these with her each week or every other week and she’ll keep the warm fuzzies for you. I recommend these from Knock Knock.


6) Lock Up Your Eyes (or Heart) A critical flaw a lot of men have these days is thinking they can flirt, talk and look at other women (that they find attractive) and think it won’t negatively affect the relationship. Set up boundaries gentlemen! Keep that ring on. Post a photo of your wife at work and talk about her often. Keep them eyes locked and you’ll keep your bride happy.

7) Speak Up! Don’t assume she knows that you love her, TELL HER! I suffered in this category terribly when we were first married. I was stubborn and dumb (probably still are a little bit) back then and rarely told her my heart. Tell her she’s beautiful often. Tell her your favorite parts about her. Tell her she does a great job at work or raising the kiddos. Say something meaningful often!

8) Let it Go In more familiar words, forgive. One truth that will never change about marriage is that it is between two humans who are both imperfect. You make mistakes and she’ll make mistakes. The key is learning how to forgive each other and move on. Don’t let things just linger; talk about them and resolve them. You can do it!

9) Take the Responsibilities This can go back to the first and second action mentioned above. Once you greet her and talk to her, get a good gauge as to where her heart is at. If she seems overwhelmed or tired, take the chores for the night. Wash the dishes, throw in a load of laundry or just go pick up dinner instead of making her cook.

10) Do a Devotion Together At least once a week make it a point to do a small devotional with your wife. You can do this easily by buying a specific marriage devotional, by picking a part of scripture to read (like the Song of Solomon) or by just talking about what Christ is doing in each others life. It’s not as hard as you think…


Which one of these items do you need to take action in this week and why?

  • Great insight, as always! Thanks for sharing your successes and failures. That’s what it’s all about. I appreciate your heart in your desire to connect the disconnected. Bless you my friend!